Let’s talk about the power of permission. One of the most limiting frames of reference in running a practice is hidden in the idea of permission.
Listen to the blog here.
Many people in our world of thought leadership get stuck waiting for permission before they publish, pitch, or package their ideas. They think the next credential or endorsement will make them ready. It rarely does. What makes you ready is using what you already know to create something of value.
Here are some of the most common permission domains. Maybe one of these is holding you back from doing the work you love, with the people you like, the way you want?
Permission from others
Often we look outside ourselves for permission. It’s a form of outsourcing. Building inner conviction is part of running a practice as a thought leader. Don’t wait for a mentor to approve your idea, a client to validate you, or the market to feel buoyant before you act. Start participating. The more you show up, the more comfortable you’ll become. This is a permission centered around backing yourself and taking ownership of your decisions.
Permission from the system
Another way we look for permission is from the system. We grow up learning to ask institutions for approval. Qualifications and credentials, for example, have value, but they’re not essential. In a practice, it’s your ideas and the impact they create that establish credibility. Notice where you might still be holding yourself back at a systemic level. This is outlier- and deviance-centered permission.
Permission from your past
Often the way we’ve been creates a template for how we think we should be. Tony Robbins reminds us that ‘our biography is not our destiny’. You may still feel like an employee or a consultant because that’s what you have been, when maybe it’s time to re-author yourself as a practitioner or a thought leader. Give yourself permission to move on from who you were. Your skills stay with you always, but how you see yourself should change over time. This is a core identity permission.
Permission from your present
A practice grows one decision at a time. You don’t need to start big. Begin where you are, earn as you learn, and keep refining your message. Give yourself permission to build momentum slowly and steadily now. Let the actions you take in the moment be your focus and worry less about what you might think you need before you can act. Or what might happen once you act. Act now, from where you stand. This is a permission centered around mindfulness and enough-ness. You have everything you need right now to make this happen.
Permission from yourself
This is the key one. No one can give it to you. Backing yourself is a decision. Trusting your own ideas takes practice. Self-permission is what allows your work to exist in the world. In my mind, this tends to be our primary limiter. We might say it’s the market, our partner, a lack of time or money, but usually these are proxy excuses for the moment you give yourself permission to do this.
Permission precedes decision. You can decide all kinds of things, but they will always be enabled or disabled by the degree to which you give yourself permission to act.
As always, go deeper to the underlying pattern that runs the game. The pattern often wags the dog when we are playing a bigger game, stretching ourselves, taking what we see as a risk or next step. See the pattern, see what lies beneath and from a place of being construct-aware, we can make better choices, take cleaner, more confident actions.
Maybe we wonder if we have the energy, the confidence, or the capability to do this work. Each of these questions might have a deeper pattern behind it.
“Do I have the energy?” might hide the question, “Can I sustain the effort this takes?”
“Do I have the confidence?” might hide the question, “Do I have to be a social media influencer to make this work?”
“Do I have the capability?” often hides the question, “Am I expert enough to charge for my ideas?”
All three of these questions (about energy, confidence, and capability) come back to one thing: permission. Whether it’s permission from others, from the system, or from yourself, the question behind every hesitation is the same: “Am I allowed to do this?”
I’ve had my own moments of waiting for someone else to tell me it was okay to take the next step. It never comes. You must give that approval to yourself.
If this idea of permission strikes a chord, take a moment to look at where you’ve been holding yourself back. Then give yourself the go-ahead. That single decision can change the rhythm of your practice.
With Love
In your journey to black belt using the revenue ladder we teach in our business school, you’ll see that each stage has a strategic focus. At the beginning, as you’re working toward white belt, it’s about decision. At black belt, it’s about investment. But I have been wondering lately if the permission piece might be what sits behind all these focus ideas.
Email me if you’d like a copy of our self-coaching framework using the revenue ladder and the primary strategic focus for each stage. It can help you stay focused on what matters and avoid getting overwhelmed.
If we haven’t connected in a while, let me know a little about who you are and where you’re at. The value proposition of our business school is based on professional intimacy, and us knowing each other is core to what we do.