Begin As You Intend to End

So much energy at this time of year around setting goals and having intentions. A lot of the self-help and personal development spaces give plenty of guidance around this.

So much energy at this time of year around setting goals and having intentions. A lot of the self-help and personal development spaces give plenty of guidance around this. The team asked me to muse on intentions and write something, which of course this blog is a result of. 

 

So to begin with maybe a word of caution: 

The setting of goals can lead to a heavy mental framework where you believe that with enough 'willpower' you can fix the wrongs in you. I don't love this so much. Beating yourself up in the process of setting goals and intentions is fairly typical in some fields of personal development and perhaps something to watch out for? You will know you are doing it as the 'shoulds,' the 'musts,' and the 'have tos' take over your internal stream of thoughts. Acts of love work better than acts of will. Move towards the things you love and the energy to do stuff will become self-sourcing. No discipline required. This is what sits behind a practice and life by design, wherein you do work you love, with people you like, the way you want. 

 

And now a way to find direction:

When you create intentions from a noisy space in your head, you simply create internal noise pollution. When you sit quietly and allow things to quiet down, you get a clear sense of what is true for you and what you need to do to move towards it. You always know. The sense of direction you get comes from a place that is true, not new. Your internal guidance system is powerful, tune into it. Trust in it. If you have not become intimate with the truth in you, then make doing so your intention. Then every other decision, goal, or intention you set will be grounded in the clear honest signal deep inside. Trust the silence.

 

And now perhaps a way to take action:

There is a subtle violence to behaviour change and personal development. So be gentle with yourself and those around you as you make change. My dearest friend and the CEO of Thought Leaders, Lisa O'Neill, asks three questions as she makes decisions. 

Is it true?

Is it kind?

Is it useful?

 

And before she chooses an action she then asks, "What would love do?"

 

These questions have a 'considerate' quality to them. Be sure to apply them inwards to yourself as well. 

 

I love the work of Professor Fogg at the Stanford behaviour and influence clinic around Tiny Habits. Fogg suggests that focusing on our minimum viable effort, the smallest unit of action towards a change, increases the likelihood that you will stick to change. This has the gentle approach that this third idea touches on. 

 

So happy New year...2022 will be full of opportunities to build your thought leaders practice. Leading thinkers, sharing wisdom, and making sense is something the world needs more of right now than ever before in my lifetime.

 

Lots of love.

 

 

Matt Church
Founder